1st.

by - 4:19 PM

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Ah. Can’t believe it’s our first. So many milestones and obstacles within the past year. Alhamdulillah, for the glad tidings and setbacks that we have faced or are still facing. Through it all, I still choose to believe that you are indeed God’s sent.

In my first year, I had to constantly deal with how others perceive what MY marriage meant to me. Mainly because I am young and often misunderstood. People tend to hover over the assumption that I either have no idea what I got myself into or I am a victim of desperation. Wallahu’alamAdmittedly, I had my doubts so did my partner. But look at where we are now. Just like that, a year with our lovely baby boy.

I knew that the ideology of getting married at such an age wasn’t a very easy pill to swallow for some. It was a questionable decision, but for some reason, I didn’t mind the questions. I didn’t mind standing my ground. I took the idea very seriously and I made necessary changes to myself, my rooh and my qalb

I needed the cleansing and told myself if all else fails what was I to lose? My decisions weren’t based on the fact that I was “ready” to write my own future and I did not need the support, care or concern of my elders. In fact, at that very point in time was when I needed them the most. If only they knew, if only they knew. 

Oh, what I had to go through before the marriage was the toughest. I promised myself to cherish this marriage even with all its loose ends. This marriage meant more than just being with someone I enjoyed spending my time with. It was more than just uplifting and embracing each other’s presence, company and opinions on the spur of the moment.

 I truly enjoyed his companionship, talking to him made me realized and see the world differently. Deep down, I think we both knew that despite our differences we were made to be a force that was purposeful.

With the understanding of each other’s past and present Alhamdulillah we envisioned the same things for the future.

My partner and i. We aren’t near perfect or so to speak. We’ve had our differences. We’ve done things we’re not proud of. We may have had one too many fights and disagreements (To many more, in the years to come haha). The occasional urge to seek approval of others just because… but all in all, we’re doing fine. Alhamdulillah. We aren’t striving for any #matrimonalgoals and we don’t find pleasure in demeaning or keeping scores with each other.

Though, during times of frustration social media has made it a lot easier to vent out your emotions (directly or indirectly) remember that communicating to your spouse is important. Talk to your spouse, practice empathy. Give yourself time to recover your thoughts and i’m sure you’ll get a lot more off your chest. InshaAllah

Understand that your marriage is intimate and sacred. Keep in mind that we have individual attributes as husband and wife that should be practiced. Any reasonable displeasure by either husband and wife should be acted on immediately and shouldn’t be brought upon themselves again. In remembrance of the 99 names of Allah, Al-Ghaffaar (The great forgiver) we were taught to forgive, no matter the magnitude. So let’s learn to forgive wholeheartedly and sincerely.

May Allah Subhanahu wa ta`ala bless our matrimonial relationship with affection and make us among those who are successful in the hereafter. Ameen. 

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